Gas Pains

Tom grew up in Milwaukee, bartended in Wauwatosa in the '70s and moved here in 1984.

Commentary, observations and musings about the outdoors, life in general and maybe Tosa politics and personalities will be the order of the day. He savors a lively debate as much as terrific cooking.

The Revenge of the Google

Gas Pains, Strange But True

You know that from time to time I have been unable to resist having a go at the humor behind internet searches.   

It recently came to my attention that I should pay much closer attention to referrals being made to this blog.  Referrals are visitors to this blog when someone is redirected here via another website.  Every published post has a log of these events.  Many of the referrals occur when I make a shameless pitch along with the link when posting on a hunting message board.  But most of the time it happens when someone is combing the web in search of information - both useful and otherwise. 

For instance, someone actually Googled why does venison give you gas and was directed to come here for a possible answer.  I wish I could tell this person it doesn't and that they probably have an unrelated problem.

I am certain that these searches are quite serious in their intent.  Yet when the search results lead someone here I am struck by the irony of being led into my blind alley of sorts.  I am humored yet frustrated that I cannot point these curious souls in the correct direction.

Someone else (possibly in some sort of digestive distress) was likely searching for an answer to their abdominal issues.  Imagine their chagrin when after searching under oatmeal gas pain it was suggested that they come to me for my sage advice.

I offer them a recipe for baked oatmeal.  An excellent recipe too. 

Probably not what they were looking for. 

My wife told me that it is bloggers like me that are jamming-up perfectly good search engines with all of our useless chatter. 

I said - No way!  

I said to her - I think I am going to go into the business of giving advice.  Advice about grilling, maintaining a healthy colon, hunting, canningdeer camp, turkey camp, the Packers and anything else that will boost me to the top of a search engine.    Butt rash too.  Just you wait and see.  Just like Joe the Plumber I will get a book deal and endorsement offers out of this.

As usual I get the all-knowing look.

I imagine the President-elect looking for something on the internet.  Maybe he's looking to fill a critical departmental position or fashion a creative economic stimulus plan.  Or maybe he's experiencing some discomfort.  That cigarette after the green chili and bean burrito doesn't seem to be such a good idea anymore. 

His all-knowing wife says - Barack, honey.  Come to bed.  You'll feel better in the morning

I can visualize him furiously Googling and attempting other searches.  He is redirected to come here.  He finds out that I am the fountain of knowledge.  Just think of the possibilities.

By the way - enjoy the wierd links while you can as they'll grow stale fast.

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